Help I'm trapped in someone elses nightmare

Help! I’m trapped in someone else’s nightmare
Many of my clients are experiencing watching people around them get laid off, lose their businesses or even their houses. Even though many of these people are doing fine themselves they are still having a lot of the same anxieties. I even had one friend whose graphic design business is booming tell me that she feels a bit guilty because many others in her field are struggling. It’s almost like many of us who are ok are feeling what’s called “survivors guilt.” The sickle of layoffs passes many by and often those people feel a bit guilty that they made it while others they know did not. This guilt will not bring your friends job back nor improve the world in any way.

We are all affected by what happens to the others around us and often we feel our friends’ pain as though it was our own. While it is nice to be supportive of your friends and family you want to make sure you don’t get too caught up in what’s going on with their world. Getting too empathic to others situations only contributes to the group anxiety and you know we don’t need more of that.

So give your friends a hug, and maybe some advise if they ask for it. Acknowledge how you feel about what’s happening around you and remind yourself of what’s true for you in your life. “I have my job, my business is doing well and I am grateful.” Then do your best to let go of problems outside your control.

If you really want to help, start by creating as much peace in your life as possible. If you mediate, do it more. If you go to yoga then do that more. If painting brings you peace, then get some new canvas. Whatever brings you peace needs to have a bigger role in your life.

Just as anxiety radiates and multiplies so does inner peace and that is what we really need right now.

Namaste

Who Cares?

Important lessons I learned after fighting for years to get down to a “Bikini weight”.

Your body will probably never look like a Victoria’s secret, they don’t even look like that; they airbrush.

Let it go.

Everyone at the beach, pool or lake are more concerned about how THEY look than how you look.

No need to be self conscious, they aren’t even looking

You will probably still have cellule no matter what you weigh, everyone does.

Nobody will notice

The truth is very few people of any weight look really good in a bikini, you might not either.

You will still look nice.

Most men actually prefer woman with more curvy bodies.

Love yourself no matter what size you are; confidence is sexy

You can wear that special bathing suit now, no matter what you weigh. If you want to, you should.

Its ok to say something "sucks"

It’s ok to say something “Sucks”

I know this idea goes against new age wisdom which promotes the idea of trying to think positively all the time and see the good in all things. While I 100% agree that there is almost always some good to be gained from even the worst of situation, I do think you need to allow feelings to come up and be acknowledged no matter what they are. You have to give all your feelings a voice, even the ones you wish you didn’t have. If you don’t, they might make themselves known in some very destructive ways.

Suppressing or pushing down feelings causes them to be almost like ticking time bombs inside, ready to explode at the next slow cashier or driver who cuts you off. These feelings often show up as strong urges to gorge yourself on food, drink heavily or even shop.

Emotions are just energy in motion and suppressing them or not acknowledging them just makes them worse. Ever try to ignore a 2 year old? They just get louder or try to get your attention in a more dramatic and sometimes destructive way.

Give your feelings an outlet. Journal, go for a run, cry or beat the stuffing out of one of your pillows (trust me, they will survive)but whatever you do, don't hold it in. You will feel better once you let those feelings flow and you are able to move on to something else.

Love yourself enouph to let your feeling flow.